Monday, December 31, 2012

Financial Sarcasm Roundup for 12/31/12

The waning hours of 2012 have reached the Pacific coast and I'm blogging away into the new year.  Here comes one final blast of sarcasm to close out this calendar.

The U.S. Senate and the White House have made a fiscal cliff deal, but the House of Representatives took a breather until tomorrow.  The lower house of Congress is missing all the fun.  I hear there's free booze for anyone who sticks around and passes the anti-cliff bill tonight.  My theory is that someone started a rumor that a "bungee jump" off the fiscal cliff meant a real bungee cord would be installed on the Capitol, and the House adjourned early when they didn't see a jump platform around.  Tomorrow they'll figure out that the actual "bungee" is the retroactive provision they can write into the deal that will take back any harsh spending cuts or tax increases that will occur on January 1, 2013.

The French aren't having any more success with their own fiscal mess.  The 75% tax on the super-rich is now null and void, so Gerard Depardieu can breathe easier during his self-imposed exile in Belgium.  I think France should cut the subsidies its wine makers get from the EU.  French wine is overrated anyway and California wine can definitely compete in quality.  I don't drink French wine but if the euro collapses the EU will try to hyperinflate it back to life, and then French wine would be dirt cheap measured in my dollars.  

Here's wishing you all a happy 2013.  It will be happy for me as long I'm sarcastic.