The prime targets for my sarcasm are still as easy to find as ever. That is not an April Fool's Day joke.
Germany's finance minister is totally blowing smoke when he says that the cram-down of Cyprus depositors was not a template for the rest of Europe. Of course it was a template! Sheesh. Maybe that's his own April Fool's joke. He knows darn well that the troika is going to repeat the Cyprus resolution all over the Continent and then the UK and US will follow suit. Read my blog article from two days ago about the publicly available template that has now been tested on a live country.
Delusional statements aren't confined to the Continent's leaders. Cyprus' president is adamant that his country must stay in the eurozone. I think he'll be changing his tune once a large number of his fellow citizens discover exactly how much of their deposits they're going to lose. Outrage has been in a state of suspended animation thanks to capital controls and daily withdrawal limits. It can't stay suspended forever.
Not everyone becomes delusional after handling sovereign finances. Two of America's former federal budget directors call for spending cuts, entitlement limits, and fiscal sanity. They're doing the right thing but no one will listen. Americans love entitlement spending and the dollar's reserve status allows us the illusion that entitlements can continue indefinitely.
Not every country believes the dollar's reserve status will continue indefinitely. The IMF reports that emerging market central banks are reducing their dollar exposure. Regular readers of my blog will have noted the trend towards bilateral currency settlements that bypass the dollar. Pretty soon the dollar will be about as welcome with central banks as an atheist in an evangelical revival tent. The euro's problems are giving the dollar a temporary reprieve and hammering the price of gold. Central banks are using this window of opportunity to reduce dollar holdings while the valuations of said holdings are still meaningful.
Those sure are some fun, sarcastic news items. I'd now like to say a special hello to a couple of my regular readers, "Mickey" and "Sharks Chef." Hi losers! I'm smarter and richer than both of you idiots put together. It's been really nice hearing about you and your friends lately because it confirms everything people have told me. I'd give you an April Fool's joke but your foolishness makes for jokes year-round. Keep reading my blog for more fascinating insights and stunning revelations.
